Q2 Quotes Database
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Themes
Updates
3/5/2009 - Quotes removed
2 quotes have been removed from the database.
7/8/2007 - Internal optimisation
The codebase has been optimised to speed up site access, and to make scripted access to this site simpler.
13/7/2007 - Some irrelevant quotes removed
20-30 quotes that relate to programming and operating systems have been removed because they probably aren't relevant to most people.
6/7/2007 - Minor correction
A minor correction has been made to the quotes database.
29/6/2007 - Theme bug fixed
A minor bug in the One theme has been fixed.
21/6/2007 - 1000 new quotes
1000+ new quotes have been added to the Q2 Quotes Database.
18/6/2007 - 900 new quotes, tweaks to site
900+ new quotes have been added to the Q2 Quotes Database. The site design and backend have been tweaked too.
11/6/2007 - Search box added
A search box has been added to each page if you're using the Simple or Bash.org themes. If you're using the Original or Lo-Fi theme then there's a Search link at the top of each page. The search results page has had a new coat of paint too.
7/6/2007 - Theme bugfix
Another bug in the theme code has been fixed. That'll teach me to test fully ;). Everything should be just fine and dandy now!
5/6/2007 - New theme, theme bugfix
The default theme has been changed from Original to Simple'n Clean, but there was a bug in the theme code that sometimes showed the new theme only on the home page, and showing the old theme on the other pages. This has been fixed. Also, there is a fresh new theme called One! Just select "One" from the drop-down above to select the new theme.
30/5/2007 - Formatting error fixed
Spaces at the beginning and end of quotes have been removed. E.g. " blah, blah, blah " -> "blah, blah, blah". The quotes in the full text have been randomly sorted again too. Also, the random quotes generater will not add a newline to the ends of quotes anymore.
The Q2 database is a collection of over 11000 funny/proverbial quotes. More...
Here's some randomly chosen quotes from the collection:
“First one out, shut the door.” -- Jerry Boeckmann, Vianney teacher, while conducting a fire drill.
Delight and amaze me!
“She's an actress, he's an actress, I don't see a problem! Wait....... that sounds wrong.....” -- Meghan, explaining to me why people on TV can kiss anyone they want.
“When I was four years old they tried to test my IQ, they showed me this picture of three oranges and a pear. They asked me which one is different and does not belong, they taught me different was wrong.” -- - Ani Difranco
I can see clearly, now that the brain is gone. -- My mother, Janice Feryanitz (also an operating room nurse in Colorado)
Surely all art is the result of one's having been in danger, of having gone through an experience all the way to the end, where no one can go any further. -- Rainer Maria Rilke
Where there is much light there is also much shadow. -- Goethe
Of course there's a lot of knowledge in universities: the freshmen bring a little in; the seniors don't take much away, so knowledge sort of accumulates... -- Anonymous
Doug: You're possessed. Nikki: Doug, what is this thing you have with possession today? Doug: Possession is nine-tenths of the law.
Nothing, of course, begins at the time you think it did. -- Lillian Hellman, “An Unfinished Woman”
“Two billion years is a long time for a PhD Thesis.” -- Astronomy Prof Balbus
I mean to tell you all the things I've been thinking deep inside..My friend..With each moment the more I love you... -- The Dave Mathews Band
“Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac.” -- George Carlin
You can pay attention to the fact, in which case you'll probably become a mathematician, or you can ignore it, in which case you'll probably become a physicist. -- Len Evans, professor, Northwestern University, teaching an honors calculus course
SCORPIO (Oct 23 - Nov 21) You are shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You will achieve the pinnacle of success because of your total lack of ethics. Most Scorpio people are murdered.
“Convictions are more dangerous enemies of truth than lies.” -- Friedrich Nietzsche
Only two things in life are certain, death and that twinkies will out last you. -- Mark Franklin
“‘Cause I wanted to, I guess.” -- Jeremy, age five, when asked why he had tried to flush the cat down the toilet.
“Intellectual brilliance is no guarentee against being dead wrong.” -- David Fasold
If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe. -- Carl Sagan
If at first you don't succeed, quit; don't be a nut about success.
“It has yet to be proven that intelligence has any survival value.” -- Arthur C. Clarke
PREHISTORIC, adj. Belonging to an early period and a museum. Antedating the art and practice of perpetuating falsehood. -- Ambrose Bierce
“I'm looking forward to the time when I get to be an animated character with a wonderful singing voice and cartoon hair that never needs excessive brushing.” -- Jim, on life as a fairy tale.
Get more here! Or get quotes other ways. Or you can even view the entire collection at once here.
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